Porn Compulsivity / Problematic Porn Use

SEX ADDICTION

When porn stops feeling like choice, and starts feeling like control

Pornography itself isn’t inherently “bad.”

But when it becomes the main or only outlet for sexual expression, or when it feels harder and harder to stop even when you want to, it can lead to guilt, secrecy, or disconnection from real intimacy.

You might notice:

“I lose hours without meaning to.”
“It doesn’t feel exciting anymore, just necessary.”
“I can’t connect with partners the same way.”

Therapy offers a non-judgmental space to explore what’s happening, why it’s happening, and how to rebuild a healthy relationship with sexual stimulation, fantasy, and real-world connection.

—— ∘ ∘ ∘ ——

Understanding Porn Compulsivity

Compulsive porn use isn’t simply about willpower or morality.

It’s usually a coping strategy: a way of regulating stress, loneliness, boredom, or emotional pain.

Over time, the brain’s reward system adapts to intense visual stimulation, leading to tolerance, escalation, or reduced sensitivity to real connection.

Common signs and contributing factors:

  • Using porn to manage stress, anxiety, or depression

  • Difficulty stopping or cutting back despite wanting to

  • Loss of interest in partnered sex

  • Escalation in content or frequency

  • Secrecy, shame, or avoidance of relationships

  • Low mood or anxiety when not using

  • Early exposure or long-term conditioning

  • Emotional neglect or trauma history

Understanding these patterns is the first step toward breaking them.

—— ∘ ∘ ∘ ——

How Therapy Helps

Therapy helps you uncover the emotional and behavioral loops driving porn use, and replace them with more meaningful ways to find pleasure and relief.

Together, we’ll:

  • Identify triggers and patterns. Understand when and why urges arise.

  • Address underlying emotions. Learn healthier ways to regulate stress, shame, or loneliness.

  • Rebuild body and emotional sensitivity. Gradually reconnect to real sensations and relational intimacy.

  • Develop mindful awareness. Practice noticing urges without reacting automatically.

  • Explore healthy sexuality. Redefine what authentic pleasure, desire, and connection look like for you.

No labels, no moral judgment. Just insight, compassion, and practical tools for change.

Book a Free Consultation

Inclusive Support for All

Porn use affects people of every gender, orientation, and background.

For some, it’s about compulsivity; for others, it’s about performance pressure, avoidance, or intimacy fears.

Therapy provides a confidential space to explore these patterns, whether you want to reduce use, stop completely, or simply feel more in control.

My Approach

I integrate Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), sex-therapy techniques, and behavioral strategies grounded in neuroscience and mindfulness.

We focus less on “eliminating porn” and more on reclaiming choice, balance, and connection.

As both a Licensed Psychologist and AASECT-Certified Sex Therapist, I help clients rebuild self-trust while understanding the psychological and physiological sides of desire.

—— ∘ ∘ ∘ ——

What to Expect

  • Free 15-minute consultation: Talk about your goals and comfort level.

  • First session: Map out triggers, routines, and motivations for use.

  • Ongoing sessions: Learn regulation techniques, practice replacement habits, and track progress.

Many clients begin noticing reduced urgency and increased emotional stability within the first few weeks.

Ready to Begin?

You don’t have to struggle with guilt, secrecy, or loss of control. You can develop a relationship with sexuality that feels intentional, confident, and real.

Let’s start by understanding what’s happening and build a plan for change.

SEX ADDICTION

Sex addiction and porn addiction are terms used to describe a preoccupation with, and compulsive behaviors related to sex and/or love and romantic relationships. They often leave a person feeling out of control, who is unable to stop despite negative consequences in their life.

Sex Addiction, referred to by healthcare professionals as Compulsive Sexual Behavior is a condition in which person struggles to control their thoughts and behaviors related to sex. Those who struggle with it, often feel as if they are unable to stop their compulsive thoughts and find themselves acting out sexually, even if they want to stop. They often  experience shame regarding the sexual compulsions, especially if it results in chronic infidelity. It is important to note enjoying sex, engaging in it frequently, or participating in kink, are not indications of sex addiction.

Some of the issues people with compulsive sexual behaviors have are:

  • Using sex as a primary way of coping with life's unpleasant feelings: such as sadness, anger, fatigue, and boredom can be quite common.

  • Some individuals may engage in compulsive and repetitive sexual behaviors, finding it difficult to stop despite experiencing negative consequences. They often feel that their sexual behaviors are out of control.

  • This can lead to feelings of regret, as many frequently report that the sexual activities they participated in were not truly desired, resulting in feelings of shame and disappointment. Additionally, they may experience feelings of depression or worthlessness.

  • Engaging in sexual behaviors that conflict with their own values and integrity, such as having sex outside of marriage despite loving their spouse, can also occur.

  • This condition can bring significant distress and suffering to those with compulsive sexual behaviors, and it can have a profound impact on their partners as well.

PORN ADDICTION

Watching porn is not inherently bad. Like sex addiction, porn addiction is characterized by a person’s compulsive relationship with watching pornography and often masturbation. The signs of porn addiction include an inability to refrain from the repetitive impulse to view porn, with compulsive masturbation frequently accompanying it. For many, porn addiction can lead to negative implications in various areas of life, including relationships, sexual dysfunction, physical health, professional success, hobbies, and social interests. Compulsive viewing of pornography often stems from using it to cope with uncomfortable emotions or escaping into fantasy, which can lead to disinterest in real-life sexual experiences or a lack of arousal without porn.

Similar to sex addiction, many individuals who experience porn addiction also struggle with feelings of guilt, shame, depression, anxiety, and stress. However, with recovery, they can begin to feel more secure, engaged in their lives, sexually satisfied with partners, and can re-establish a healthy sex life.

Close-up of a printed page with a stylized, dotted halftone image of a woman’s face, with sectioned text visible on the side.