Men's Work
Mentors for boys and young men are noticeably absent in our culture. Fathers who have gone without good guides themselves are so often absent or at a loss, or even harmful in bringing up their son. The son grows to be a man, yet without truly learning that it is right to feel emotions and the right to express himself.
What makes a man a man? To me it's taking on challenges, having a purpose, a mission. Taking full advantage of your gifts, and not wasting them. Listening quietly enough to find your calling, and never ignoring your needs; not expecting others to meet them, but depending enough on those who can help. To be strong yet flexible, grounded and open. To have the courage to stay in the moment, to feel what you’re feeling, and to act on it. To be conscious of your boundaries, and to respect the boundaries of others. To respect yourself, and to accept who you are. To believe in yourself enough to treat others with reverence, curiosity, and acceptance.
Eating disorders can also be a reflection of how an individual experiences their body. When thinking about gender in binary terms, men and women experience their bodies differently. For example, the female body is often culturally construed as an object with an emphasis on appearance (i.e., objectification). In contrast, the male body is often constructed as functional and instrumental, focusing on physical ability and muscularity. These differences can lead to different social pressures and associated behaviors around appropriate body and weight. Although the pressures are different, both men and women suffer in response to one-dimensional cultural expectations. Furthermore, experiences of racism, acculturative stress, homophobia, and transphobia can greatly impact racial and ethnic minority men, men who have sex with men, and transmen.
My areas of expertise
Eating Disorders
Depression
Anxiety
